SWEET, SWEET ESTROGEN

Few things will take hair off your chest as thoroughly as stepping into Bittersweet, a cafe here in Rockridge that specializes in chocolate. Chocolate bars, chocolate milk, chocolate pastries, hot chocolate, etc. When I asked the friendly guy behind the counter which amongst their vast wall of bars would best portray the typical characteristics of the trinitario and forastero cacao bean varieties, my testes shrivelled and died and I felt the sudden urge to watch “Sex and the City.” Perhaps this was why the tattooed-surly-trendy chick prepping drinks proferred my chocolate milk with particular disregard. I guess it’s impossible to respect a man to whom you have just served chocolate milk.

Regardless, Bittersweet is a shop for chocolate epicures, a species of foodie arising from the darkest depths of frivolity. Read this article if you dare. I acquired two bars, a forastero from Sao Tome by Chocolatour (Belgium), and a trinitario from the Carribean by Michel Cluizel (French). Forastero is the kind of bean found in most conventional chocolate, but this bar had a distinct mellow but smokey character. Trinitario is a hybrid between forastero and another type, criollo, and apparently has more of a bright, fruity tang. If this sounds pretentious, it is. But both bars are also delicious as was my chocolate milk. The latter was kind of shock, given that most of my experiences with chocolate milk came from a can of Kwick (Quick? Kwiq?). I look forward to comparing their spicy hot chocolate with that of Jacque “Beuwhtter” Torres.

Addendum. I have sampled their spicy hot chocolate and it was small and over-priced. However, it tasted terrific, just spicy enough, and not too sweet. Not nearly as thick and creamy as Jacque’s, but that might actually be a good thing, because a cup of that stuff is more than a meal. However, Bittersweet also serves hot c in American and European styles, whatever that means, so the story doesn’t end here… This time the place was filled with young couples. Still haven’t decided if that was more or less emasculating.