YOU KNOW, I DON’T GET

you know, i don’t get this crazy slugger contest thing. i hate baseball. i really hate it. it’s full of fat pitchers, drug users, and stupid costumes. and i just think it’s nowhere near as athletically demanding as soccer or wrestling. yet despite all this, i’m excited that mark mcguire has broken the home run record, and that sammy sosa is one run away from doing the same. it’s probably because of my mom, who has a mild interest in baseball. she was watching when mcguire hit 61, and she was excited. i guess it’s contagious, because i was excited too. i’m still excited and i don’t understand it. i guess it just has to do with the fact that it’s so classic. giants of the great american pass time doing what no man has done before. it’s practically cinimatic. it’s spooky man.